Friday, February 15, 2008

Day-After-Valentine's-Day thing

I found this on another unschooling blog here: It might have been better to have found it yesterday, but I have some things to say about that. Keith has been gone since 5:00 Wednesday morning; it's Friday; he's coming home Monday afternoon. He and Marty are at an SCA event near Phoenix. Holly and I are home in Albuquerque. Kirby is in Austin.

This is not like "I'm in Virginia, Keith's in Maryland and Kirby's in D.C." It might be hard for people from little-state places to understand, or for people from the U.K., but Canadians and Australians will know, and those in the western U.S. will know. We're all spread out.

But that's not the topic. The topic is this:

1. What is his name? Keith Edward Dodd

2. How long have you been together? 30 years

3. How long did you date? We were together for six years before we got married, but there wasn't much "dating."

4. How old is he? 51

5. Who eats more? Keith

6. Who said I love you first? He indicated affection first. I probably said "love" first, but it wasn't for a while after his first awkward stammering attempt at saying he thought highly of me. I wasn't getting what he was saying, and his roommate interpretted thusly: "He's trying to say he thinks your shit smells like roses."

7. Who’s Taller?
Keith is 6'1" and I'm 5'4"

7b (question that wasn't asked: Who's Older? I'm three years older.

8. Who can sing better? Singing together is what created the relationship. He has a more impressive voice. We both can sing lots of styles and can both read music. I can harmonize by ear, and can remember small details of tunes and parts. Keith knows more songs than I do (and that's a lot).

9. Who is smarter? When we were younger, I might've been, but part of that was courage and experience. I've seen Keith grow into a kind of logic and wisdom I can't match. He's smarter. Sometimes I can figure out something he can't figure out, though, especially if it involves cloth, and we've done lots of physical projects together, like tents and specialized bags for holding games, and yard-projects and such.

10. Who does the laundry? I do.

11. Who pays the bills? Keith does.

12. Who sleeps on the right side? He's left-handed and sleeps to my left.

13. Who mows the lawn? Keith.

14. Who cooks dinner? I do more than he does, but he does at least once a week. Some nights we go out or just eat leftovers or "freezer food." For real from-scratch cooking, though, he does some and I do more.

15. Who drives? Keith.

16. Who is more stubborn? I am.

17. Who kissed who first? We waited quite a while on that one, and I bet it was mutual, but I don't remember. He kissed my hand early on.

18. Who asked who out first? He took me to The Cooperage, in Albuquerque. I heard later he had had to borrow money from his roommate (a different roommate) to pay for the dinner.

19. Who proposed? I did, kind of as a joke that immediately sounded sensible. And we weren't the only two people in the room.

20. Who has more friends? I do, but he has lots too and many I don't know, because of work and hobbies.

21. Who is more sensitive? Both pretty sensitive. I guess I'm more.

22. Who has more siblings? He had two full brothers. I have one sister and a later half brother and two cousins who grew up with me and my sister. I grew up with four kids in the house, and he grew up the youngest of three, and the other two left fairly early. He was the last to leave his home, and I was the first to leave mine.

23. Who wears the pants? We get along well enough that it's not been an issue, and we respect and trust each other, so advisement and decisionmaking flow pretty freely. He makes more money decisions and I make more kid-raising decisions, I think.

There wasn't a good place in there to mention that I was married when we met, and for a while the three of us lived in one house. My first husband taught my second husband to ski. Y'know... it was the 1970's and it was northern New Mexico, and it was me... I have a surprisingly soap-opera kind of life some seasons. And yet, 30 years and three very cool children in, it seems so stable and normal! (Normal for me, which, well...)

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